How to: Take the Monotony out of Monogamy after the Honeymoon Phase

In this first installment of Ms. Date Guru’s Relationship/Sex column on the N Crowd Blog, I will be discussing the factors that make relationships go stale and how to get the spark back. There is a natural progression to relationships: First there is attraction, then lust, then intimacy.

Most people start feeling bored after the intimacy phase. A common complaint I hear is: the honeymoon phase is over, we lost that spark from the beginning. Well you know what ladies? Only boring people get bored. Do one spontaneous thing for your partner and you’ve planted an idea in his head - It will only be a matter of time until he reciprocates.

Longterm relationships aren’t a walk in the park. Forgive the life coach shpelle but if you want to succeed at anything in life, you have to work at it! And in order to make a long lasting effect on your relationship, you must talk to your partner and make an oath or commitment to make the necessary efforts and work to revive your beginning spark!

Once that’s clear, you can start exploring ways to increase spontaneity in both partners. Romance is an essential ingredient for a lasting monogamous relationship- and spontaneity is a large component of romance. It is just as important, if not more, to keep the romance alive a few years into a relationship as it is in the beginning of a relationship. This is where many people fail because they slowly taper off romantic gestures and sentiments especially when cohabitating. The best way to make a positive change in your relationship is to make changes both inside and outside of the bedroom. In addition to increasing frequency, there are many ways to change it up. To watch some more tips to take the monotony out of monogamy from Your Tango:

See this VIDEO post for more tips: http://natashamusing.tumblr.com

* Fall Back in Love….With Your Life Together

Embrace the parts of the relationship that you can’t control and accept them. Things that you can’t personally change shouldn’t be mentioned or discussed. Take any nagging phrases out of your vocabulary. Throw in a sincere compliment about something that is important to your partner.

* Shake Up The Routine

Shake up your routine and try new things for new ideas. Check out this blogpost for interesting date ideas. http://msdateguru.blogspot.com/2012/04/ms-date-gurus-monthly-dating-dish.html

* Spend More QUALITY Time Together

When you are together, focus on getting into a positive mindset. This includes: refraining from complaining, and appreciating as much as you can from the experience. Do an actual activity instead of just hanging out together. Another surprising way to strengthen your bond is learning to making something together.

Jessica Berdan is Ms. Date Guru by day and relationship connoisseur by night on a mission to revive chivalry and teach girls everywhere how to go from doormat to dream girl.  msdateguru.blogspot.com is an open discussion on love, sex, dating, and relationships. Email msdateguru@gmail.com to get any relationship, dating, or sex questions answered. Twitter: @msdateguru or http://twitter.com/#!/msdateguru