Showing posts with label love shyness relationships social phobia dating advice men disorders. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love shyness relationships social phobia dating advice men disorders. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Three's Company

The Guide To Utilizing A Third Wheel:
           The commonly accepted definition of "third wheel" is, "One who deters the socialization of a couple, perhaps when being invited out of pitty or through a feeling of duty. This person may be eased into the situation by being allowed to stay in an envirnment he or she has become accustomed to (perhaps a kitchen, where the third wheel can bake cookies for the couple.) The third wheel may feel uncomfortable about watching the couple canoodle on his her her sofa, but none of this is taken into consideration. Ex: Emma is such a third wheel/ cock blocker." (source: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=third%20wheel)

        Try to rethink you idea of the third wheel, they shouldn't be seen as cock blocks in social situations having a third wheel is actually beneficial. When you have a third wheel, the couple may seem less intimidating to outsiders and therefore more approachable. Going out with a couple is fun, it gives you the freedom you want but the structure you need. Couples are reliable, you know they won't ditch each other and they're have an exit plan and make more responsible decisions than hanging with other singles. So re think your dating strategy, and try going out with couples, it allows for the best combination of networking ease and social freedom. 

Female Third Wheels:
        They may not even be considered a third wheel by the couple. But the female may often feel left out and feel like a third wheel. But compared to male third wheels, female third wheels proves more useful in social situations opening the door to many more social experiences. They are way more useful in social situations that can open the door to interactions with other circles and to play match makers with your mutual friends. It's a win- win-win situation for the couple, the "third wheel" and your mutual friend!

Male Third Wheels:
         When you have a single male as a third wheel, it's still not bad. The couple may act as an incredible "wing man", it's easier to have a couple as a wingman because it's easier and more relaxed to approach a group of women that way. Two guys commonly appear predatorial to single women and as soon as they are being approached, they feel like field mice with a swooping hawk above. Couples balance the male to female ration and neutralize tense social situations. If your target, the women you are trying to whoo, is around a couple which activates the relationship schema, in psychology we call this a "prime," making her feel all warm and fuzzy inside. When couples are around single women it ignites many emotions from jealousy to annoyance or appreciation which makes her think about relationships. The popular notion that weddings are the easiest place to "get laid". The same rationale behind that hold true here, being around couple often makes women more likely to be open, hookup, or maybe even agree to a date.             

Monday, November 30, 2009

Love Shyness

Love shyness is a real disorder that’s affecting many social phobic college-age men. love-shy people find it close to impossible to assert themselves in social situations in romantic and sexual encounters with the opposite sex, although they may be fairly comfortable in friendly situations because f the large amount of social anxiety (that something bad will happen).

It’s a real issue: love-shyness afflicts approximately 1.5% of American males and will prevent about 1.7 million U.S. males from ever marrying or experiencing intimate sexual contact with women!

People effected with love shyness are usually characterized by the following:

You are an adult male

You have never, or very rarely had girlfriends

You have never, or very rarely had sex

You have remained single while all your friends dated and got married

You are so inhibited by your fear of asking a woman for a date that you never do

- Wikipedia

Causes may be due to bullying in school due to their shyness and inhibition so they may have fragile self-esteems and egos, making them strong targets. Another cause may parental upbringing, where they might have been abused whether verbally or physically, negative comparisons, or plain indifference. This may cause the love shy male to build a shell around to protect himself and further isolating himself. They may even avoid social situations with their peers as well the opposite sex; making this a “vicious cycle” inhibiting further social interactions. And a good friend of mine, “The only way to break a continuous cycle is by some kind of external force.” That force is change, you need to be eased in to force to change your habits